Break out the Kleenex

I guess Heidi didn't know there were bugs and mean people in the jungle...

Oh. My. Gross.

(picture of 3-cheese bread bowl from Domino's web site)

So, I'm sure you guys have seen the Domino's commercial advertising their new Bread Bowl Pastas. I don't know about you, but I find these ad's pretty vom-worthy.

It's essentially a hollow pizza crust filled with cheesy, greasy pasta. Heart attack in a Bowl. 

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm sure one spoonful of this would entice any drunk person's wildest dreams, but I can only hope that after a couple drinks I would be able to 'Just Say No.' I think my heart and stomach would thank me profusely in the morning. 

What's even more disturbing then the thought of eating this bread bowl? 

The picture I found of what one actually looks like when it's delivered to your door. If this image isn't enough for you to opt for the pizza instead of the Heart Attack Bowl, I can only wish you the best of luck in digesting this starchy, carby mess of a creation.

(what the 3-cheese bread bowl really looks like:                                                                   

image via thisiswhyyourefat.com)

Strawberry Fields Forever

As many of you guys may know, my absolute favorite OPI nail polish is 'Italian Love Affair' but while I was home this weekend, I'm pretty sure I found a close second.'Love Affair' looks brilliant with a fierce tan, as it is a soft, baby pink. 

However, I was in the mood to really make a statement with my nails, and I wanted a bold color to start my summer off right with.

'Strawberry Fields' caught my eye instantly because it has an iridescent, purple tone that makes the pink really pop in the bottle. It looks even more spectacular on your nails, hence why I can't stop looking down at them.

If you're looking for a change from your typical bright red or hot pink shades, you should definitely check out 'Strawberry Fields'.

   

You know what you did...

L.C. wants to forgive and forget MTV

Eonline.com: "The Hills stars reveals in the new issue of Cosmopolitan that she knew she'd had enough of the reality series when—wait for it—the MTV producers invited Heidi Montag to L.C.'s birthday party. So rude!"

"After the producers did that, I disappeared. If they were disrespectful, I was going to be disrespectful back. I told them, 'You can call me in a week. Think about what you did,' " she tells the mag.

Current Mood:

Thrilled!

I will be in my hometown this afternoon, and I could not be more excited!! It's been far too long since I've seen my family and friends, and I can't wait to catch up with everyone!

I'll blog more from the Sunshine State! 

Hope everyone has a fabulous day!!

xx

emz

Absolutely Adorable

Nicole & Harlow walking into tape Larry King yesterday. I really hope lil 'Low makes an appearance on Thursday's show. How cute are her lil piggies?!

Guess Who?

“I don’t feel like I look like the other perfect little pop singers. I think I’m changing what people think is sexy.”

This one's for you: Lauren's Derriere

"emilie...how am i supposed to work out if you don't post your fist pumping workout playlists on your blog?? get on it, my butt is suffering :-)"

(feel free to play the first on repeat)

LUDA- "Georgia"

Sugarland- "It Happens"

Lady GaGa- "LoveGame"

Charlie Robison- "New Years Day"

Flo Rida- "Sugar"

Pitbull- "I Know You Want Me"

Miranda Lambert- "Love's Looking For You"

George Strait- "How 'Bout Them Cowgirls"

Cross Canadian Ragweed- "Cry Lonely"

Sugarland- "Take Me As I Am"

River Wild.

I hope you guys had a fabulous Memorial weekend. I know I did. We tubed down the river on Sunday and had such a blast. What was supposed to be just a three hour float turned into six, but we didn't complain. In fact, no one was ready to get off the river at the first exit so we kept on going. 

I got quite the stares in my raft because I was in a blow up pool. A 'party' pool to be exact. Best decision of my life. I laid out the entire time, dove out of it, swam around in it and got to hold all the beers. Life was good. 

Until the bottom ripped out of it. A small hole surfaced, because there are rapids on the Guadalupe River (who knew?), and so I ripped it without knowing. Anyway, the hole was fine at first, but it quickly turned into a much larger one, and before I knew it, some members of our group were swimming up through the bottom and jumping in with me. That didn't last long and before I knew it, the bottom went out right from under us. I laughed. My friends laughed. What else could we do?

Thank goodness that my roomie got an extra tube for her feet and I was able to use it for the last hour of our float. Although, I much preferred just swimming around and enjoying myself. 

Until I decided to swim breast stroke right into a rock and scraped my stomach and upper thigh area. It hurt, but someone yelled 'pour beer on it' so I did and I swear it did the trick. At least for the rest of our river day. 

After we finished our float, we drove back into the city and indulged in some yummy Mexican food at one of our favorite haunts and as soon as we got home, we all quickly fell into a mexi-coma. All in all, it was a wonderful weekend, and I am so looking forward to our next River Run. 

I can totally relate to this

"I was told for a very long time that I was not pretty enough, too strange, not edgy enough, but I’ve always been famous, it is just that nobody knew."

--GaGa

Happy Friday!

This is one of my new favorite songs that I thought I would share with you guys. The bf claims the song is 'terrible' but I catch him whistling it every now and then, and he never turns it off when it comes on the radio.

He especially loves my version (that I sing in my best Billy Currington voice) God is Great, People are Good & Beer is CRAZY!

Enjoy below and have a wonderful memorial weekend!!

Kingston's mom is b-a-n-a-n-a-s

And, he already looks like a bad ass, even with a pacifier in his mouth.

This look is Huuuuuge!

According to Paris, 'Huge' is going to be the new 'Hot' but you have to enunciate the 'U' when you say it. All together now, "Huuuuuge!"

Jon & Kate put on a Brave Face

It was the sextuplets 5th birthday this weekend and it looks like they had a blast! I wish I could say the same for their parents...

I hope they can keep it together for the kids, but I can only imagine how I would feel if my husband cheated on me with a 23-year-old, but to be fair, I don't know how I would feel if my wife back handed me everyday on camera. 

Soul Sisters

I find it ironic that Minka Kelly and Leighton Meester are filming a movie together because I have always thought they looked so much alike. The flick is called 'The Roommate' but I'm thinking it should be called something more along the lines of 'Separated at Birth.'

And, I also don't know how I feel about Minka dating my other boyfriend....Hands off, sister!

Ageless Beauty

(popsugar.com)

On aging: "It's a journey. It's a total journey. But it's also true. I mean, I'm not 25 years old anymore, nor do I want to be. I wouldn't even want to go back to being 30. You know what I mean? That journey—I've done it already. I don't want to do it again. It's a lot of work to get through it, and I am excited about moving forward. I think that people get caught up in getting back to some place that they already passed. Or to a place where you cannot stay."

Bow No!

Who cares about Miss California getting to keep her crown. What I am dying to know is who invented the hair bow? 

Paris sported this look in promo shots for her new 'My BFF' show and got some serious flack for ripping off Miss Lady Gaga:

                                                   (image via perezhilton.com)

But, Paris claims on her twitter page (i know, i know, i'm supposed to be taking a break. last post, i promise) that she rocked the bow back in 2006 at a movie premiere and even included a pic. Oh snap. 

So, the question remains: Did Gaga copy Paris? Break out the extra-strength hair spray, it's about to be a cat fight. 

Have no fear...

Emz is here!

So, because of J Layne's comment on my most recent post, and this blog post: http://anmoczynski.wordpress.com/2009/05/11/where-oh-where-has-my-fave-betch-gone

(which brought a tear to my eye, but honestly, it doesn't take much lately. Hello Hormones.)

I am back. 

Thank you so much for reading me every day and being such devoted fans. Your blogs are also some of my favorite reads, and it makes me feel so special that you girls actually care about what emz sez. It's a great feeling, especially when you spend so much time writing and never know what people think. If I can make you both smile with a post, well then consider my job done. 

I've been neglecting you guys because I've been really busy and interviewing up a storm. Some have gone better than others and some I am hoping, wishing and praying that I hear back from soon. Hopefully some wonderful news happens in the very near future so I can share it all with you.

I also have another confession. I've been kind of cheating on you guys with someone. His name, you ask?

Twitter.

I am addicted. I like it so much better than facebook, but I definitely have missed blogging and would never want to replace my first and best outlet to express myself. Twitter might have to take a back seat for a while.

It wasn't over...

The Notebook was on TV last night, and I was so bummed because I missed my favorite scene in the entire movie. Leave it to youtube, though, to have it, and now I will spend this rainy afternoon playing it on repeat. Gets me every time.

Happy Saturday!

In a Kenny kind of mood.



Hope all of you are enjoying your weekend!!!

Fugly Fergie

What the hell kind of outfit is this? I'm at a loss for words, but if I had to pick one:

Ew

You know the old saying...

Couples that dress together stay together.

Yah, I totally just made that up, but I really hope this is the case and it's the reason why Reese thought this ensemble would be a good choice. Elle Woods would be none to impressed.

URGENT: LINDS NEEDS A CHEESEBURGER

STAT!! Girlfriend is looking rail thin.



Eonline.com

Too cute for words.

I don't know what it is about this commercial, but whenever it plays it literally sends Liz and I into hysterics. The little boy is so darn cute and we wish they showed him cheering for 'Flat Bottom Tacos' longer!

Watch below. The bf is not so impressed. But, whatever, what does he know? :)

Hello, Yellow!

Loving LC's sunshine inspired frock she wore last night to an event in Hollywood. The color is oh so appropriate since temperatures reached 100 degrees yesterday in LA. It's gunna be one sizzling summer, and I am so excited for all of the hot summer styles.

Loving these.

Right about now. I just treated myself to a pair of summer sandals, and I am absolutely loving them! I sported them today to break them in (aka show them off) and lets just say, they are definitely keepers!

I got stared at while I was crossing busy intersections, and, yes, they were good stares. I didn't see any horrified looks, just people envious of my new bling bling (or so I like to think). The true test, though, was emailing these pics to my mom for approval.

She gave me two big thumbs up. What do you guys think?


(my toes look weird, but it's unbelievably hard to take a picture of your feet while holding your Mac. seriously, try it.)

Kim K at her finest.

Looks like someone got a bit too much sun and ate one too many burritos this weekend in Mexico. (Can we blame sun poisoning on the decision to get cornrows, too). I'm sorry, but didn't she first break into the Hollywood scene by dressing some of LA's finest?

You would think the girl would know how to dress and maybe how to protect her face from the sun's harsh rays. Just a thought.



(Dlisted.com)

Daily Banter

via facebook chat:

Me: u coming home for lunch?
Liz: i dunno.. i was thinking about trying to go tanning on my lunch break.. i havent been once all week

(they tried to make her get treatment for tanorexia and she said, mo' mo' mo' heat)

Having one of those days. . .

Can't shake the funk.

Dear Recession,

You're really making my life difficult, and you keep me up most nights. But, guess what? I still have faith. 

With Kindest Regards,

Emz

Can't we all just get along?

As disturbing as the below text is, I can kind of see where The Hulk is coming from. His wife left him for someone a year older than their son. The whole situation is just creepy and sad.

I have always had a special place in my heart for The Hogan's because I grew up in Florida and saw them many times cruising in their convertibles, and at the mall. 

(via Eonline.com)

"I could have turned everything into a crime scene, like O.J., cutting everybody's throat," he said, per the New York Post. "You live half a mile from the 20,000-square-foot home you can't go to anymore, you're driving through downtown Clearwater and see a 19-year-old boy driving your Escalade, and you know that a 19-year-old boy is sleeping in your bed, with your wife… I totally understand O.J. I get it."

Eat your heart out, LC.

I wrote an article about the side-braid a year ago, and guess what? It is still a go to look in Hollywood. I kind of secretly hope it stays that way. I am a personal fan of the side-braid and love rocking it.

The best thing about this look is the messier the hair, the better. It doesn't have to look perfect to still look effortlessly chic. J-Simps defines my point perfectly with her messy bun.



(image from popsugar.com)

Get your groove on!

Latest dancing list:

Human-- The Killers
Beautiful, Dirty, Rich-- Lady GaGa
Waking up in Vegas-- Katy Perry
Blame it-- Jamie Foxx Ft. T-pain
Kiss me thru the phone-- Soulja Boy
Turnin me on-- Keri Hilson
Kids-- MGMT
Love Sex Magic-- Ciara Ft. J Timberlake
Move-- Mims

In a word: Gorge.

Blake Lively on the latest issue of Allure (via popsugar.com)



On her image: "I'm blonde, and I have a small dog, so I try to avoid looking like a piece of bubble gum."

Cry for help or did Loca Lohan just make this for extra drug money?

Either way, I find the below video disturbing, and not in the least bit funny. The only thing comical about the whole thing is that it's all, well, true. At least she's finally admitting that she's a drunk, pantie-less, broke night owl. Watch below:

Lindsay Lohan's eHarmony Profile from Lindsay Lohan

love love*

Yes, please.

My new anthem:

It's amazing what 8 years can do to a voice. . .

I've been a little reminiscent today of the good 'ol Jessica Simpson days, circa '99-'02. Anyone else miss them as much as I do?

Gone are the days of long, blonde hair and pop songs sans heavy breathing. They have been replaced with fake, blonde-ish hair that usually needs to be brushed, mom jeans and a type of vocal compilation that could make glass break, coupled with the most vulgar facial expressions known to man. 

Don't believe me? Check out my little gallery of live music from Miss J Simps. The first is from 2000 and just makes me want to dance around, and the last from 2008 makes me want to hurl. Chunks. What happened to our bubble gum pop girl? I'm so over the 'affected' and 'wounded' latest version. Go back to your roots, girl (and, no, i don't mean make another country album...heaven help us all!)

Sign me up.

I don't care that this movie is called 'Fighting' (seriously, that's the best they could come up with) or that it's gunna be violent and probably really cheesy. 

Nope. 

All I care about is one thing, and that is . . .

Channing. 

Tatum. 

Yes, please. Break me off a piece of that...Check out the trailer below, and try not to drool too much.

Lookin good, B!

Here's an almost unrecognizable Beyonce this past weekend. I am loving the bangs, and the shades. D.I.V.A

Memories.

This song always takes me back to my summer in Acapulco. How I miss thee.

In Hollyweird news...

I really hope all of this hoop-la about Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson breaking up is true. Maybe LezLo will finally get the help she needs, and eat a cheeseburger while she's at it. 

Best part about the whole 'alleged' story, though? SaMAN apparently ended it. 

That has to burn. 

Real bad. 

Quote of the weekend.

E! Online.com: "We're best friends," Paris told me. "It's not like we just met. We've known each other over the past year. I was in a relationship before and we reconnected. I'm really in love and really happy." 

Is it just me or did you guys hear this same quote when she was dating Benji Madden, Stavros, Paris, Nick Carter . . . I give Doug another three months until Paris gets bored and wants fresher meat. 

Cut & Color, Please.

I, along with Amy Mo (anmoczynski.wordpress.com) need a dye-job. Badly. Before I moved to Texas, I got low-lights and high-lights in my hair to create dimension and Jennifer Anniston-esque color, which I think I achieved pretty well. But, now, my hair is looking more like a bad version of Whitney Port's. The ends are golden, and the top is darker brown with a few strands of caramel mixed in. I need help, and a stylist. 

I think instead of a new Easter dress and basket, I am going to ask my mom for highlights and a cut. Seems fair, right? Yah, I'll let y'all know what she says on that one. . .

If not, I'll leave my address so you guys can send donations. 

XOXO.

For the love of...

Most ironic thing about this picture is that both Lil Kim and Kim K have dated Ray J. I guess he has a thing for Kim's or maybe it's another certain asset.

Fashion Do(nt)

I love Little J on Gossip Girl and her impeccable fashion sense, (Seriously, why was she not around when I had to wear uniforms to school for ten years. I would have killed to have pink tulle underneath my navy pleated skirt).

I even liked her 'dark' mode when she wore metallic eye shadows and liners. I definitely tried to emulate her look, but I decided I needed her fierce bangs/cut to pull it off. 

This look, however, just doesn't do it for me. I'm not feeling the fish net tights, or cropped jacket. I would have ditched the jacket, and tights, pulled my hair up and switched out the black platforms for some patent Louboutins. But, that's just my two cents. 

The semi-perfect pink.

This isn't my beloved 'Italian Love Affair' but Sally Hansen's 'First Blush' isn't half bad.

And, get this, it was only TWO dollars. In this world I call Big Girl Land, I'm all about bargains.



I applied three coats to get this desired look. And, yes, that's a glass of Chardonnay I'm holding....in case you were wondering.

This is I have to report:

It's officially Spring Time!

Thanks for reminding us, Paris!

The end of an era.

Are you guys as apathetic as me that this is Lauren's last season on The Hills? A part of me does feel some nostalgia solely for the fact that we kind of grew up alongside each other. We went through some of life's biggest moments together, like graduating from high school at the same time, starting college the same year, dating boys totally wrong for us and our undeniable love of fashion.

She was there for me through the thick and thin, but I am ready to let her go and her side-braid (seriously, how many seasons has she been rocking it now?)

Out of respect, though, I will definitely tune in for her last few episodes on The Hills, but I have a feeling she will be back someday. For now, I think she needs to focus on revamping her favorite hair style and her fashion line, which just got discontinued. Oopsies.

In reality TV news...

P-Nasty is hosting the Bad Girls Club Reunion tonight (holla...thanks for the reminder Kel)

&

The Countess, Luanne, on Real Housewives of NYC is getting a divorce?! Woah. Doesn't that go against her entire book of etiquette? Hm, does this mean she will finally stop making us commoners refer to her as 'The Countess' because frankly I'm sick of it. 

The only one I really feel for in this whole sticky situation is their family dog, Aston. He's a Westie, and too cute for words!

It's Miley!

Down-right awful video, but good song.  

Check it out below, preferably with a blind-fold. And, can someone please call home girl a dentist to fix that snaggle tooth? Oh MiLeY Gosh...